Keith Bray

BA,CALC,ICF Certified
Addictions & Life Coach
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PostHeaderIcon KEEP THE SLATE CLEAN

Sunday, 01 November 2009 10:18 | Written by Keith Bray | PDF | Print | E-mail

KEEP THE SLATE CLEAN
Most weeks, the weekly Idea Engineer I get from my coaching instructor and mentor Dr. Randin Brons triggers a meaningful thought within me. This is one of those weeks. Randin writes:
Forgive the hurts

"Forgiveness will never fail to free you." -- Jerrold Mundis
"How do we forgive when we're angry and hurt?
As a first step, we can be willing to truly feel our anger and hurt. Honouring our feelings by being fully present with them helps to release the feelings themselves.
And it helps to remember that people only hurt others when they themselves are in pain. When we can recognize the other person's suffering, our heart can open in compassion. We can also remember that at some time or another, we too have hurt someone through our own unskilful action.
Only love can heal the rifts caused by a hurtful deed. Forgiveness holds immense power because it mends separation. It moves us towards the unity and love that lie at the core of our being. It is a fundamental part of the healing process."

"Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future." -- Paul Boese
For a long time I carried resentments against other people with me like a backpack. Man did they get heavy, and did me no good.  It was like having people take space in the apartments of my head without paying rent.
I am grateful today that this rarely happens and that those apartments are occupied by positives. Sure I get POed, but I try to deal with these feelings at the time they happen. Funny, upon reflection, some of the feelings are caused by my actions, or miscommunication and I try to put my wrongs to right immediately.
This is one of the skills I have learned through a co-creative process of life recovery, a new way to live.  The process calls for me to feel my feelings, look at them and then let go of them. In doing so, it truly does help keep me out of the past and enlarge the future.
Loving self and keeping my relationship with me healthy allows me to feel true compassion and love for others, and I try to keep the slate clean on a daily basis.
Do you find this a hard thing to do? (hopeserenity.ca to reply to this question or discuss).

 
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